HowTo Bring Up Normal Kids
- Argue in front of the kids and, ideally, get divorced
- Use the TV as a full time babysitter
- Keep your emotional distance
- Say ‘no’ then give in. Also use bribery
- Don’t worry about routine
- Give them sugar and processed food daily
- Resent their needs
- Put other things first, like you career and free time
- Put them down and criticise them
- Send them to a ‘good school’ focused on exams
- Marry someone who loves you and work at your marriage every day
- Both of you stop working full time after the first kid is born
- Throw the TV out the window
- Live in the child’s world and engage
- Slow down to their pace
- Put them first
- Move where you can be outdoors. Eat healthy.
- Choose a school that nurtures their whole personality
- Respect and talk to them
- Let them be themselves
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